Friends, readers, lurkers, followers, viewers...I am grateful (and a little awed) at your response to yesterday's post. Thank you, from the bottom of my slightly needy heart for your very, very kind words and thoughts.
|In your face, winter!|
- Top - Homnage, consignment; last worn here in October 2015 for Thanksgiving
- Skirt - Milano, thrifted; purchased here on the weekend for $14.99
- Shoes - Big Presence Desmond, Fluevog; last seen here in January with a colourful bomber
|I love this crazy top!|
And now, I'm going to note some questions and musings that came up from your comments. I love that, by the way - if you ever want me to ramble on about a topic or if you have questions, go ahead and ask.
1. Reader Linda mused about the classic "fit and flare" silhouette (in the first outfit of this post): Do people respond to it so strongly on her, or because they like the shape? Is it because it's a shape that suits her pear-shaped figure? As a classically feminine shape, is it making her less powerful, in a way? She is in a leadership position at her job and is avoiding this shape because of these concerns.
Here are my own thoughts - I'm sure we'd all love to hear yours!
I think we're conditioned but also hard-wired to love an hourglass shape on women. It's the Venus of Willendorf, it's the 50s shape of clothing, it's about as feminine as you can get. It emphasizes the waist and the breasts and implies big ol' "birthing hips" (as one of my friends used to say), so it's about as female as you can get. That's the hard-wiring part of it.
I also think that we're bombarded pretty much from birth with images of exaggerated hourglass silhouettes on female figures. From Barbie to "Mad Men" that shape is everywhere. We grow up envisioning that as the "right" female shape, even when there are obviously so many other shapes and varieties out there.
For Linda, she plans to avoid that silhouette in her work clothing in order to be taken seriously. I tend to agree with her; while it certainly is possible to maintain one's femininity and still look powerful, but it's hard to do it in a pouffy skirt. My own job allows me a wide freedom in my personal expression (through my clothes, hair and tattoos), which I love. I'm an artsy person and I would feel stifled in classic women's business wear all the time, although I do dabble in it from time to time.
I notice that when people first meet me, they often do not expect me to be smart, well-read or efficient, and I'm sure that's because of how I dress sometimes. If I wanted to "climb the corporate ladder" I'd definitely dress differently, and being more aware of the reactions one gets while wearing the fit and flare shape.
I work with a Director in my company, a lovely woman in her 40, who is in a power position, and she always looks amazing. She does wear mostly black, white and grey, with pops of red and cobalt blue, and she mostly wears pencil skirts. When she does wear a full skirt (rare), it's one that is well below the knee, and she always wears a classic pointy-toe pump and a fitted jacket. It works for her and looks very professional. She has my vote for the classiest woman in the office.
However, Linda, please don't be afraid to express your fun side on your personal time. Look for the fit and flare in your casual or weekend wear - and definitely try it in a party dress. Bask in the compliments you receive!
|I loved wearing this skirt and made everyone feel it - it's like a scuba suit!|
I work for a really big IT company, as the Administrative Assistant (aka the Receptionist), but I'm way more than that. I'm also Facilities, a little bit of Finance, a bit of HR, a bit of Security. I'm also on the Social Committee and the Health Committee, I write the monthly newsletter for my province's offices, and all communications on our company "Facebook" for things happening in the office. I'm also the decorator, the go-to person, the repairer of the printers, hanger of pictures, the taker of pictures, keeper of swag, the keyholder, the knower of everyone's name, general sunshine girl, and the VP of Awesome. I report to the VP of our province directly, and he pretty much lets me run the place. I've been doing this for 5 years, as of March.
I look after two offices in my city - it's a very physical job, which is why I'm really careful with my health (keeping my weight down, staying fit) so that I don't hurt myself.
I also work as a leader for Weight Watchers - I won an award a few years ago (here in 2013) - and lead one meeting a week.
Both of my jobs are very outward-facing and service-oriented - I am really good at both of them (yah, I'm so full of myself), but they are emotionally exhausting. I often have nothing left by the time I get home, and can get snappy with L or completely withdraw. I'm an introvert who's learned to be extroverted, and it's something that I struggle with: how to take care of my mental health and make sure I recharge and take real time for myself. I tend to overwork, over-organize, over-volunteer and just take care of things too much, so this is something I'm working on. It's why my posts are often very brief: I just want to slam them out and then relax. I need a lot of chill time.
Well, there you have it! Respond (or not, but wouldn't that be awkward after we've all shared, ha) as you will.
- Bangle - vintage expo, $4.00
- Earrings - gift from Simar
It was so windy walking home that I had to take these jangly-dangly earrings off and stuff them in my coat pocket.
And now, I'm off to do a little self-care and hole up in the bedroom and read with a warm kitty against me while L has guys over for role-playing (Lovecraftian horror!). Again, I'm humbled by the outpouring of supportive and wonderful comments after yesterday's post - thank you. I